Monsoon Madness

The Bombay suburban network doesn't really bring images of beauty to your mind. The overflowing gutters, the garbage dumped by the railway tracks - not too pleasing to the eye.

Sometimes though, the elements and the location just combine to provide the ideal setting. There had been light rain earlier in the morning. The train pulled out from Dadar station towards Elphinstone Road where the two Central and Western lines diverge after Dadar - a great big expanse open land in the centre of Bombay with the illegally cultivated spinach, palak and god knows whatever else growing between the railway tracks. The plants had this wonderful fresh look to them. And with the early morning shower, all the dust and pollution in the Bombay air had been washed out of the sky to leave bright clear blue sky

There on a train in the heart of Bombay you were traveling through this pristine world - the green, brown and blue combine to present this idyllic scene. All to be destroyed by the onrushing train in the opposite direction. The other train passes and you are back in the world where you can almost brush the buildings on the side of the tracks. Back to the real world after a split second visit to a dreamland.

And they tell you that the rains bring only gloom.

The calm before the storm

So I sit here waiting for the cyclone Phyan(yes, there already is a wiki up! And wiki on cyclone naming conventions) to hit. The TV channels have of course take gone berserk on coverage. Can't remember which but there was one which even asked a question comparing this to the last nov terrorist attacks. I can't understand what was the stream of thought that linked a natural "disaster" to something that was one of the most brazen attacks on India in my lifetime.

Anyway, there is an air of expectancy about the town. BMC has got out its disaster management cell and are looking less clueless than usual. Weather wise, there has been no rain for a few hours now. Maybe this is the cyclone sucking in all the moisture before hitting town. I'm getting images of early morning cartoons that used to come when I was a kid, where a cloud would take a deep breath and everything used to get sucked in. The morning rain has freshened up the trees and cleaned the air out. Am clearly able to see out to beyond Vashi bridge from home. Quiet nice actually.

Now to see if the met dept gets one prediction right for the season atleast.

Edit:- We've been had. But is it considered a success that people peacefully made their way back home and things seemed to have a semblance of control, even though the entire incident seemed mostly looked overhyped?

Looks like that is to remain my luck with cyclones.

Cough Cough

How many people think that the recent spike in swine flu incidents is due to the tactical manipulation of the media by the producers of the recent GI Joe movie?

Come on. Its bloody obvious aint it. Wear a N95 mask and a helmet and you look like a sure fire Cobra shocktrooper.

Cobra commander just had the last laugh.

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Got a cold and cough. I'm sure the vindictive Gods will make sure that i've got the swine flu after this.

* Observation based on comparison with the awesome tp that used to be GI Joe cartoons at 730AM on Star Plus way back when.

Fire Fire Fire

Was walking to the station the other day on my way to work. There is this bank on the way. Just as I was passing by the money van had come in. And there was a security chap guarding the van. This guy was equipped with an SLR. All well and good.

Except the bloody thing didnt have a cartrige fitted on. Neither did he look like the  kung fu move making sort (tho one might have second thoughts after seeing Kung Fu Panda).

Are the banks so broke that they can't even provide adequate protection to money? I'm taking all my money out right this instant.

There. I have done my bit in closing down a few more banks and adding to the economic situation. Muhahahahahaha

Casper's Playground

Do not be the last person leaving your home for a long vacation. And definitely not in the monsoons.

I was left the enviable job of having to store things in such a manner that they would not rot under the onslaught of the moisture in the air. End result, the day before I was scheduled to leave everything in the house is under old sheets and drapes. Add to that, the crazy wind blowing through unseen gaps in the windows providing a chilling background score.

No. I am not to be blamed for the sidey spooky films that have been released recently. And yes, the place survived the monsoons

This is an endorsement

There. i didn't lead you along.

Well lets see if unconventional advertising works. Shor Bazaar - Might be worth giving them a listen. You could then claim to be one of the original fans when they start raking in the moolah.

Enjoy

Townie

Running around Fort over the last two weekends and you realise how much you relate to that part of town. I moved out of South Bombay some five years ago. However every trip into 'town', as suburbia calls it, leaves you with a good feeling lasting a few days.

No, the town that I know is not the pseudo exotic bull image that people get while reading Shantaram. Yes, there are seedy places about on causeway, but there are seedy places everywhere.

It is the old world charm that you get in the area which is so appealing. The walk from Gateway to Radio Club, sunset at Marine Drive while seated near the Oberoi, roaming around Fort, going up rickety staircases to obscure offices that pay Rs 20 bucks as rent while raking in thousands, the unknown side roads on Mohammed Ali Rd, Kalbadevi Rd. all brilliant.

Then there are monstrosities that the Brits have left us. VT, the buildings along the Oval, Fort as a whole. To me, the ideal picture is one taken from the one end of the Oval, getting the Institute of Science, the University and the High Court in the night when it is all lit up.

Was inside GPO last week. The tall dome, the lazy uncles and aunties at the counters...there is a charm to it. Unlike all us morons in the IT industry staring away at PC screens pretending to work while orkutting. Bah... ended up spoiling a nostalgia post with that. (Follow link...mind blowing video)

Perspective

You'd never think that something as simple as changing glasses would make that much difference. Have changed four cheshmas in the last week. The original one broke, was using a my earlier ones, then got one to get around my blindness and finally got the new pair yesterday

Each change gives a surreal different view. People not wearing glasses will never understand the subtle differences brought about in vision while shifting from one pair to another. Learnt long time ago to not complain to the optician - else be prepared for lamba kahani (Probably came from getting glasses from bawa uncles.) Most of the change comes in the corner of the eye type vision, but even then it is very disconcerting. The best comparison that I can think of is looking through a glass tube. Straight vision fine, the corners all wonky.

Remember the last time I changed glasses. The first day after getting them i was running to catch a train at the station. Misjudged the height of a ledge i tried skipping over, caught my toe just at the corner and ended up sprawled on the platform in peak hour traffic.

No more locals currently, but wierd things could still occur. For now, I got sight! I got sight!

First in Not Last Out

Not sure that anyone's been bitten by a leach. Supposedly once they get their grip going they suck till the last drop or drown from drinking too much blood. Only way to get them of be to burn them

Well me has gone and burned the bloody leaches at site of me skin finally. For now atleast. Hopefully it can be made permanent. Only time will tell. Next need to find a way to get the other leaches off.

in your face turds...I'm still Alive.

Horse Racing

Annual ratings nikla? Thats (and its variations in other languages) all that I've been hearing the past few weeks at work. So finally they are out

Highest rating mila?

Acha, to kya karega?

Wohi hamaal giri?

Mast hai...

What difference the ratings make is a mystery. Only thing that they really seem to be doing is bolster your diminishing ego.

They should start a sweepstakes to see who gets what. The unpredictability will atleast provide more fun than our glorious cricket team...

On the Gravy Train...

You know when people say that there is a presence about a place...what do you call the opposite of that feeling? Things are just going as normal...then suddenly out of the blue.. you are hit with the feeling that there is something missing...call it the Absence?

Had the absence kind of feeling yesterday...was on my way back ...reach Sion....suddenly things seem different...seems much quiter...a eerie sort of silence ..like someone has flicked a switch which kicked in a filter to block out certain frequencies.. was wondering for a few minutes what the crap was going on...then it kicked in..all the fans in the compartment had gone off..amazing how that subtle drop in background noise can affect you..

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At the other end of the decibel counter are the morons at Dadar hawking away...Was sprinting from western to the central side at 1 in the morning the other day to catch the last train when this idiot with a megaphone (for real) gets in my way brandishing a book..."Hare Krishna! Why dont you buy the Bhagvad Gita?"

If I had the time I would have asked him why doesnt he shove that megaphone down his windpipe...Wanted to ask him whether he was bloody blind or he could not see tht there were a sum total of ten ppl on the bridge..and not one in the mood to listen to him..What really stuns me is that the guy actually expected me to stop

Well its appraisal time ... looks like god needs to meet targets...

And did we tell you the name of the game, boy,
we call it Riding the Gravy Train.

Reminiscences

Nine months back to the day I was sitting in Bangalore airport after missing me flight contemplating whether me should go back and get me shoes...looking at the line for check in i decided that i would leave them there...thinking where they going to go in a couple of months...got onto a propeller aircraft with me two pieces of hand luggage and made my way over

Well...lets hope they are still there...without any cockroaches/mice/frogs etc in them. Meanwhile i have learnt a few things here

• first and foremost a game called mail...this essentially involves people with highly inflated egos going for each others throats using e-mail. Rules of the game...only one...i am right you are wrong...grammar...non existent...the challenge...to find obscure reasons to blame the other ...or better yet..to push work on the other...everyone must take part...sadly...me wasnt much good at it

• you can give the AVP of the company an earful...only you willl get that back and more when your boss hears of it

• people have a far more extensive vocabulary than you would ever expect..especially when they realise that a mistake has happened

• it is great fun having a go at vendors...especially when you yourself represent one and the other has no clue what you are on about...you can claim that your operations are based out of Outer Mongolia and charge extra for whale oil to heat the place and get away with it

Now let me go check if someone has got a thesis out on the decomposition of leather

Run...Forest...Runnn...

Saw this video after a long time the other day...that got me thinking...has anyone attempted a full speed sprint across the main bridge at Dadar at say 11 am? Is it even possible?

Me is willing to pay for lunch for anyone who manages to get from one end of the thing to the other in 15s ... the only thing...is you'll have to find me to get the lunch if you do manage to..

Lost arts...

A friend of mine sent me to this site which has a pretty intersting theme to it...the world cup in ascii art..

Got home and later in the night our good friend google throws up this...where i find this...some people really have way too creative minds with tooo much free time on their hands...

spectacular...visit...especially if you are absolutely pakaoed and at work...

It got dark...

...and darker still....till it was night...

Then...at the precise moment when me stepped out to have dinner...the
sky came tumbling down...not exactly...but it did start pouring..

Seemed like the gods had decided to to take out their frustration on
me...each time me was not under cover it poured...walking from office
to lower parel station...station to home...end result one very
drenched me by the time he gets home...

Hell...who cares...its been a while since me got meself
drenched...anyone has a football...or better yet...a frisbee?

A different world

Actually left work while there was still some natural light about yesterday...Got on a fast back from Dadar...lost track of the stations passing by and realised i'd missed my stop only when i reached Thane...so back we go

Coming out at my station...me's initially not sure whether i've gotten of at the right place...loads of ppl abt, the shops all open and brightly lit...totally disoriented...somehow managed to get back home

looks like you dont need hash...altering timings is enough...

Pitter-patter

Woke up the other day and couldnt believe it was 8....nce and thought it was the sunrise..checked clock and got up...opened blinds to see a cloudy day...with promise of rain..and it did...in the afternoon

Been sitting in a mill..Modified redone and all that...but without any false roofing etc....suddenly it goes all dark..and hear this massive sound....look up see the rain through the skylight...the sound...closest i can think of is possibly a bass drum on reverb...

I wonder how the chaps who used to work here earlier used to do there
work with the machines and the noise in the monsoons

So its women's day...

....That explains why me day has gone to the dogs....

Ended up having a three and half hour conference call with ppl at work starting yest midnight.....follow that up with reaching work early and leaving late.....

Ok I got cake at work out of it....an altogether wonderful day...

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I got fire....I got fire...

The week just gone by....

Monday morning get up a bit late...was supposed to go in in the
morning....was leaving home at 830....when i get call....where the
crap are you....get work as soon as possible..listen to the
pm...put mobile in pocket...get on bus...get off bus...check
pockets...no mobile...

Tuesday.....miracle happens....i reach work before 9....am dazed for
the rest of the day

Wednesday...reach at around 930...go have breakfast...come back..see
mail from PM asking to meet her...go thinking i'm going to get crap
for not doing any work...sit down...she asks...how you feel about a 1
month...max two month stint in Bombay...me
thinking...huh...where did that come from...think abt for a
moment...then signed me own death warrant by saying yes....am told i
have to leave asap...if possible get there by tomorrow morning....put
in a travel request...get tickets to travel by the 9pm flight to
Bombay...am told this is a EMEA/ES project by the new PM who is in
Pune in the afternoon...leave work at 7....reach home at 830...chuck
my clothes into a bag...reach airport at 855...to b told that i
have missed flight....again...

This is where Thursday comes in...run around at the various airline
counters in Bangalore Airport...to be told that only Jet has a flight
by which i can even hope to get to Bombay in time for Thursday
morning...buy ticket....leave Bangalore at 12...reach bombay at
2...home at 230...sleep...and am of to Lower Parel at 9am....come home
i think at 1030...eat...sleep...

Friday...home....work...home...sleep...

Saturday...wait today is saturday right?
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Back again
Shady's back
Tell a friend

18° 56' N 72° 51' E

Me....bombay...home...yay